Introductions and icebreakers

So you may have heard that in August, I leave for a 27-month term of service in the Peace Corps. I applied in January, and have since interviewed, been nominated, received the necessary clearances, and been invited to serve in Panama. I moved through the application process more swiftly than many others, but I'm still anxious to get more information about my assignment and future home. This is the first time in my life when I am unsure exactly what my future holds.

I'll provide you with more details about the work that I'll be doing and where I'll be doing it as that information comes in. In the mean time, I'll let you know a little bit about why I'm doing it. One of the things that has surprised me most about this PC process is the awkward lull it brings on whenever I mention it in conversation. I've told dozens of family members and friends about my plans, and only a few have responded favorably right from the get-go. And of course, even though at times I've felt a lack of support, I can't blame those with reservations. It can be a scary thing for a young woman with virtually no experience living internationally to pack her bags and commit to an unfamiliar place for more than two years. I worked hard through college earning degrees that may or may not be of use to me in rural communities in Central America. I'll be leaving my family and friends behind, with no guarantees about how often we'll be able to communicate. I know there will be times when I feel that I've gotten in way over my head, and times when all I want to do is come home and see my family, to go back to the life I've always known. When it comes down to it, I've recently found out, joining the Peace Corps is something of a nightmare scenario for a lot of people. And I know full well that embarking on this adventure is a little naive and idealistic.

That's also what I like most about it. When people ask me incredulously why I want to put my life on hold for two years, I have trouble explaining it to them concisely because there are so many reasons rushing through my head. And to me, this isn't putting my life on hold at all. It is living my life in a fuller, braver, riskier, and hopefully more rewarding way then I've ever been able to do before. It will be a test to myself, to see what I'm made of, how I handle immersion in a new culture. I'll gain technical, social, verbal and physical skills that I probably will never have the chance to do stateside. I'll build upon the years of Spanish I've taken and, with luck and persistence, be fluent by my close of service. Because I'll be working in rural locales with indigenous people, I'll also be learning to speak as much as I can of their languages, which date back to the pre-Columbus era.

One of the three main goals of Peace Corps is to spread a positive of Americans internationally, and participate in cross-cultural understanding. When I'm done, I'll bring a unique perspective to whatever job I work, which will be a priceless professional and personal asset. I've been so curious for so long, and have been given a chance to get some of my questions answered. Just as Teach for America hopes their corps members will go on to be activists for education policy, the PC wants returned volunteers to continue to bring their first-hand knowledge of development issues and other cultures back with them to the U.S. The PC provides me with unique ability to gain first-hand experience in dealing with the problems I care the most about.

Many people consider the PC volunteers to be noble, "save-the-world" types. And some of them are. I too believe in public service and universal responsibility. But I also want my work to be more than that, to be worthwhile, sustainable and befitting of the community I'm serving. So many development and aid projects fail because those who design them don't understand the real needs and desires of the people for whom they're intended. I sincerely hope I'll be able to help in a meaningful way. But I'm also going into this knowing how much there is for me to gain. Over the last few months I've been devouring blogs kept by volunteers in various countries, and they've been incredibly helpful in helping me imagine day-to-day life. This isn't a two-year vacation. I will be thrown into situations I don't know how to handle, and at times, given more responsibility than I deserve.

So as excited as I am, I'm just as nervous. Things will get tough. But in my experience, the decisions that are hardest to make are often the ones that yield the greatest rewards. I hope you'll continue to check in with me as I blog as often as I'm able.

I think this is going to be good.